Decluttering without the Overwhelm

Hi, my name is Jody, and I accumulate stuff.

Are you considering moving into a different, and possibly smaller home?  When you look around does it get overwhelming because you have accumulated...

SO...

MUCH...

STUFF?

I’m a retailer’s dream client.  If you say it eliminates wrinkles, I’m going to try it!  That headband that they swear eliminates the ringing in your ears, I’ve bought it.  Neck tension reducers, car scratch removers, mold and mildew cleaners.

If someone in a FB ad swears it works, part of me wants to believe them and I need to try it.   The irony is that all the stuff rarely works and ends up lying around and cluttering the house.  I don’t want to throw it away because I just paid my hard-earned money for it.  And part of me doesn’t want to throw it away and add it to a landfill. 

But the clutter…all the clutter, all the stuff in piles makes me anxious.  Based on a StorageCafe survey of about 17,000 people, 54% of Gen Xers and 51% of Baby Boomers

have storage units to house the overflow of their stuff because it won’t all fit in their house!

Today we’re going to be tackling something probably long overdue…Decluttering.  As I am a Realtor, this can be to help you move, but in reality, so many of us need to declutter, even if we’re not moving!  The irony is that we spend the first half of our life accumulating things and the second half of our life trying to figure out what to do with it all.  Moving is the perfect time to declutter!  Don’t move anything that you don’t have to! It costs money to move things if we don’t really need to move them.

If you are downsizing, purging might be a necessity.  We might have less space and can’t fit everything.  but if you just want to declutter, or even if you are moving to a new, or larger space, decluttering is so freeing! So, how do we tackle 10, 20, 30 or even 40 years of stuff?  One room at a time.

My husband and I recently updated our kitchen and when it was done and we were restocking our cabinets, we purged expired food items that were tucked all the way at the back of the shelf, items that we didn’t need or never used.  It was liberating! And exciting!!

So where do we start?  Let’s start with the most cluttered or messiest room.  Why? Because when it’s done, it was the biggest project and will give us the biggest sense of accomplishment and motivation to tackle the next space. Take a before and after photo.  Show yourself what you just did and give yourself a huge pat on the back! 

Now, How do we start? Step one, is mindset.  You have to want to declutter.  I know it’s hard. Every item in your house has a story, right? 'Oh, that’s the vase from Aunt Carol’s third wedding. It’s okay to be sentimental, but remember: memories don’t live in the stuff—they live in your heart. And let's be honest, half of this stuff you didn’t even remember you had until today. And you may think that your kids are going to want your things someday, but they won’t.  They might want one or two things to remember you by, but usually they will have their own stuff.  Plus, they likely have different styles and tastes and your things probably aren’t theirs.  As you well know, the prospect of decluttering can be stressful for you. Don’t leave that monumental task for your kids. Do it now, and do it for everyone.

And if some of the stuff is your kids’ stuff? If you’re drowning in things your kids left behind,

it’s time to play a game I like to call, 'Come Get Your Stuff!' Give them a deadline to take their treasures, or it’s going in the donate pile. You’ll be surprised how quickly they can show up when they think their high school yearbook or their baseball card collection is about to be donated.

"'Hey, sweetie. Remember that box of trophies you left in the attic? Yeah, the donation truck comes Thursday. Love you!'"

So, here's where the magic happens…four boxes. One box for things you’re keeping.  Things that you need.  Essentials.  Or things you use a lot or that bring you joy.  Have you used it in the last 2-3 years?  Is it an heirloom and super meaningful?  Books?  Are you actually going to read it a second time?  Clothes?  When is the last time you wore that?  Did you even remember you had it?  Do you even like it or need it?  Then why are you thinking of keeping it? We have to stop with the “might need it someday” mentality! 

A second box for donating—you know, things you probably won’t miss.

Third, is the going to the trash box, and finally, we have the 'Sell' box. Now, this one’s tricky. We all think we’re gonna make lots of money on Facebook Marketplace or ebay.  But let me ask you right now….are you actually going to do it? IF you are, research what things have

sold for.  Not what they’re listed for, but what they actually sold for.  If you are only going to make a couple of dollars after buying boxes, envelopes, bubble wrap, and postage, plus that trip to the post office…is it worth it?  We’re trying to purge here, so maybe that ugly Christmas sweater ends up in the Donate box and frees you just a little bit more.

If you have a lot of things to sell, maybe you consider having an estate sale or auction.  Estate companies typically charge a 30 to 40 percent commission rate on all items sold with a gross sales minimum.  And keep in mind, you will have people tromping through the house looking through your belongings.  Does that work for you?

If you are moving, how much space are you moving into?  Will there be fewer bedrooms?  Less room for a dedicated office or workout room?  Will you have a large lawn at your new place?  Will you need all of those yard tools?  You need to figure out what things will fit in your new space.  Do you have a floor plan of your new home?  That’s always super helpful!  What activities bring you joy?  Do you love to cook?  Then maybe you keep more of your kitchen things than someone who eats out and never cooks at home.  Do you love to read and a having home library brings you joy and peace?  Then maybe you do keep more of your beloved books than someone else.  This is a completely individual journey!

This might be a slow process.  It took you years to accumulate all this stuff, so it’s going to take some time to go through it all.  If possible, give yourself more time than you think you need….ideally years!  If you are just starting to think about moving to a 55 plus community, or an assisted living facility, or a smaller or just different house, start decluttering now!  Work through one room at a time when there is no pressure or hurry.  If that is just not possible, and you have a quick timeframe to work in, unfortunately, you’ll have to do it, but do it faster!  It may seem daunting, but maybe find a partner to keep you accountable. You’ve got this!

When asked how they felt, people who have recently decluttered tend to use words like, “Unburdened”, “Lighter”, “Freer”, “Relieved”, and “They wish that they had done it sooner”. Not only will you feel lighter and freer, but if you are moving, uncluttered homes tend to sell faster and for more money.  That’s a Win-win!

Once you've cleared the clutter, take a moment to bask in the glory of all that newfound space. Look around—see that? You can actually find things now! And here’s the best part: Less stuff means less stress. Your home isn’t a storage unit—it’s a sanctuary! So, reward yourself. You’ve earned it!

So, empty nesters and downsizers of the Greater Raleigh area and beyond, if you’re feeling overwhelmed with all the stuff you’ve accumulated over the years, just know that you're not alone. It’s never too late to reclaim your space and simplify your life. You don’t have to be a minimalist and get rid of everything.  Just get rid of that which is not needed.  And when you're ready for that next big step—whether it's selling, buying, or just dreaming about downsizing—I'm here to help. Be sure to check out the links below for helpful links, and don't hesitate to reach out if you're ready to make a move. You’ve got this!